Solitude & Service

The first time i heard of the word hermitage (rhymes with arch not age) was when i was at a Catholic mission home of some sort for a planning retreat. We had booked a classroom there so that we wouldn't be distracted or disrupted in our planning. We had a vegetarian meal for lunch where we met the Sister-in-charge. She told us that they have hermitage as well. It's a small one-room building for those who want to be by themselves. Meals are delivered to them, and the room is simply furnished with a bed and table. Catholics who are facing crisis, or need to be alone to make major decisions like becoming a nun, etc can make use of the hermitage. Absolutely no human contact. No phone/internet as well. Live like a hermit lah, where the word hermitage comes from.

i am reminded of this when i read the interview of a well-know Buddhist monk. He is French and had a PhD in cell genetics before he became a monk. He travels with the Dalai Lama, attends World Economic Forum in Davos, runs humanitarian and heritage projects. He counted 70 airline boarding passes last year alone. Here comes the part that blew me away:

"Personally, I feel wonderful looking at the Himalayas from my hermitage. It is 3m by 3m with a big window facing the mountains. There is no heating, no hot water. It's paradise," he says.

"The only reason I come down is to serve. Compassion should be put in action, otherwise it is sterile."

We can choose to be alone for all the wrong reasons like running away from decision, from deadlines, from pressure, from disappointment etc. We can also choose to be in contact with other people for all the wrong reasons like i need to compare to feel good about myself, i need to let others see how well i'm doing, etc.

When we choose solitude, or short periods of solitude, without any human interaction of any sort (including being away from all forms of online activity), it should be for the purpose of cutting off distractions and focusing on listening to God and/or yourself. i have a friend who does this yearly. She is a youth pastor and she always takes time to be by herself to reflect on the past year and to think of the coming year. She packs with her clothes and pen and notebook. While she might be taking a walk by the beach where there are humans around, she doesn't make contact with them.

i think it is a really powerful lesson to learn that being with people means to serve. Christ teaches that too. In fact, it's major lesson in Christianity. But it is so difficult to practise. We can connected to FB, but looking at the activities going on in there, very often they are self-serving lah, like posting the latest purchase, presents, restaurant meals, gadgets, places you visit, or your latest statement of boredom, etc. But of course FB can also be an avenue to serve when needs are posted. Someone is in pain, ill, disappointed, happy, etc, we can always offer a word of encouragement or prayer and better still practical help if possible.

i just shared a story in today's lecture of an amazing teen who sailed around the world solo, non-stop and unassisted for 210 days. i asked the class to imagine what is going through her mind (internal landscape) and the answer came loud and clear from these young people - loneliness.We joked that they can't even last an hour without internet, let alone 7 months. But i pointed out to them that this girl in her video diaries and interviews said that she has embraced her loneliness and found ways to deal with it. She sang, document her daily activities through video and writing, she speaks to the bird that stopped by her boat, she celebrates when she crossed an ocean, she was in awe of sunrise and sunset, etc etc. Needless to say, for this 16-year old, she has learned one of life's important lesson - solitude.

Solitude and Service. Thank you for your lessons :)